Touched by loss. Empowered through community.


Sunday, January 10, 2016
Posted By: 
Becky Lichucki

I have started cleaning and decluttering and letting go of "stuff". I'm tired of having junk everywhere and I'm working hard to find joy...and teach my child that the"stuff" isn't important.

The funny thing about stuff is that it is there for a reason. I had a shoebox of body sprays in my cabinet in my bathroom.  They were dusty and haven't been touched since I left Houston 8 years ago. I picked them up one by one and looked at the bottles. Bath and Body Works doesn't even have the same labels anymore. I held each one in my hands and then took a breath and remembered my old life. The County Apple, Strawberry Lemonade and Japanese Cherry Blossom transported me out of the frozen tundra that is Chicago this week and back to Houston. I could see him in my mind and I could almost feel him.

It still amazes me that so much time has passed, but that my sense of smell can still take me back. Then it hit me. I don't really want to be back. I rather like my life at the moment and I have worked hard to get where I am.

Don't misunderstand me. I miss him fiercely. He was the love of my life and our souls are forever entwined. He taught me how to be loved-which was no small feat I assure you.

Missing him doesn't mean I want my old life. I can still miss him and be happy and with that thought, the "baggage" went into the recycling bin. It's odd how getting rid of nearly empty bottles has given me a sense of calm. I feel like getting rid of more clutter...I  wonder what else I have laying around that gathers dust but brings no joy? My memories are in my heat, not in dusty things. 

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